![]() I thought that the last time I had been in Orchard Hill about two years ago there had been a gorgeous apple orchard right where I was standing-an orchard that actually made sense of the name Orchard Hill-and that now it was gone. Although, on the bright side, it was exactly the same butthole hideous as every other condominium on this particular block of the Orchard View condo complex, so at least it wasn’t alone in its butthole hideousness. I thought that the dingy gray condo in front of which I was now standing-discernable as my new home solely by the fact that the movers had propped the storm door open with a cinder block-was butthole hideous. I thought that my ass hurt from sitting for four straight hours on the car ride from Maryland to New Jersey. What did I think? I had to take a moment to sort out an answer to that one. I cannot wait for the first day of school. Does Chloe know?Īre you kidding? She sent a 911 text to the girls and they’re already convening at Jump. My mom says they’ve been living in a trailer in West Virginia somewhere, like, under a bridge or something. I heard she’s been sunning herself on the French Riviera for the past two years living off all our college funds. ![]() You are never going to believe who I just saw driving through town in a Subaru. ![]()
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